The essence of Larissa?

The latest quote from my supervisor:

"The Larissa essence is in trouble because she's playing the wrong records in her head."

At the moment, I'm struggling a bit with anxiety and depression. Fortunately, my PhD supervisor has been very supportive and encouraging. Anxiety is like a vicious cycle of negative thoughts, which lead to the release of stress hormones, which lead to physiological responses like increased heart rate and breathing, which lead to more negative thoughts... My supervisor suggested that the negatives thoughts are like a record (yes, he admitted this illustration is outdated) but I can turn off the record player or ignore it.

The 'Larissa essence' bit came in because I'm 'old-fashioned' and not a post-modernist, so I'm more likely to take my own thoughts more seriously. Or something like that.

Unfortunately, I don't yet feel that I have control over the record player. Still working on that!

Red Sun Band

I don't know whether this would be exciting news for anyone else... But I know theredsunband. Well, two thirds of them anyway. I went to primary school with John (drums) and high school with Sarah (guitar). It was quite trippy the first time I heard them on the radio.

Talking to myself...

When you're talking to yourself
And nobody's home
You can fool yourself
You came in this world alone
...
When I find out all the reasons
Maybe I'll find another way
Find another day
With all the changing seasons of my life
Maybe I'll get it right next time

Recognition

You know you've been somewhere far too often once the people who work there start to recognise you...

I think I'm currently recognised in four places:

1. The Coffee Cart, Library Lawn, UNSW - they even know what coffee I order

2. The Italian take-away shop in Centrepoint where I used to buy coffee and toast before my shifts at DJs

3. Diana Ferrari, Centrepoint

4. The most recent one - the bookshop at UNSW:
"You seem to be in here buying books a lot. You must like reading."
"I like buying books. It's kind of an addiction."
"There are worse addictions to have."

How true.

Books I read in January 2005

1. Gaston Leroux, Phantom of the Opera

2. John Grisham, The Pelican Brief (light holiday reading)

3. Melina Marchetta, Looking for Alibrandi (reminiscing about high school)

4. Melina Marchetta, Saving Francesca

5. Anna Johnson, Three Black Skirts (my favourite 'self-help' book - gives me hope that one day I might get my life in order!!)

6. Laura Doyle, The Surrendered Wife (found in the humour section of my brother's home library)

7. Matthew Pearl, The Dante Club (Literary crime thriller)

8. Sasha Cagen, Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (apparently Jesus and Mary Magdelene were both quirkalones. Interesting...)

9. Tim Winton, Cloudstreet